


Our Strength

by scarletandgreywidow



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Coping, F/M, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-06
Updated: 2015-03-10
Packaged: 2018-03-16 13:14:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3489551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scarletandgreywidow/pseuds/scarletandgreywidow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The team copes by living out what Trip embodied: Compassion, loyalty, heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Compassion

**Author's Note:**

> Each chapter explores how different team members cope with the loss of Trip.

One by one they peel off from the impromptu, living room memorial service. The stories of Trip slow down and the beer runs out until only Fitz and Simmons linger, as silent and unsure as ever. 

“I…I guess I should go, then” Fitz stammers, “To bed, I mean.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Me too. We’ve got a lot of long days ahead,” Simmons agrees half-heartedly as she stands up and begins to fluff pillows that don’t need to be fluffed and straighten the already straight couch cushions.

Fitz can sense that something is holding her back. It doesn’t matter, he tells himself. There’s nothing he can do to help her. Instead he just nods and mutters a meaningless “G’night.”

…

It can’t be more than two restless hours later when he hears the swish of fabric and rhythmic padding of a person pacing in the hallway outside his door.

He approaches the door with a sure-footed stride. He has been through this routine a million times with her, but as he inches closer he pauses, wondering if they still do this, but quickly he opens it. Perhaps now is a time for compassion, not for the thousand unanswered questions that have swallowed and expanded the once small space between his heart and hers.

The door is barely cracked when she blurts out, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come. I’ll leave.” 

“No. Don’t go,” he says more confidently than he feels and opens the door more widely. He watches his hand reach for hers, though, surely his brain did not tell it to do that.

“I couldn’t sleep,” she says as she follows him towards the bed.

“I know.”

It is inevitable and unexpected when they fall asleep in each other’s arms in an attempt to keep away the guilt, the questions, the nightmares. It works for them tonight as it has worked for them a million times before.

They won’t talk about it in the morning; they don’t talk about anything anymore.


	2. Loyalty

Coulson can’t say for sure that he is waiting for May to join him on the rooftop of the Playground after returning from his trip to see Trip’s mother, but he is sure his feet brought him up here under the setting sun for a reason and he isn’t surprised when she sits down wordlessly next to him. The blowing breeze cools the air around them and he takes advantage of it to lean into her shoulder more than is strictly necessary.

“It never gets easier,” he says after a few moments of quiet spent appreciating the comfort of her constant presence. They have spent many quiet nights before on many different rooftops dealing with many different losses.

“It shouldn’t.”

“I know,” he looks her in the eye and says before sinking back into silence.

The stars have begun to splatter the night sky when he next voices his swirling thoughts.

“I’m afraid we’re losing them, our team.”

“What do you mean?” she prods.

“The team is fracturing, falling apart and there’s nothing I can do about. Trip is gone. Fitz barely speaks to Simmons. Simmons can hardly look at him without crying. Skye is…” he trails off.

“I know.”

“I don’t know how I’m supposed hold us together anymore. I don’t know if I can. I’m making it up as I go, May.”

“I know.”

“And…and I have to do it, but every day I wake up and wonder who will still be fighting for good at the end of the day, who will still be here? You know?”

“I’ll be here,” she says with just a hint of a smile.

“I know,” he replies with a grin. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't usually write Coulson and May so I hope I did them justice.


	3. Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skye memorializes Trip.

She finds the time to do it when she’s not sleeping which is every night lately.

Somehow it helps Skye to do something with her hands and with her mind. The idea of having a real memorial to Trip settles her racing thoughts a little.

The plan appears almost naturally to her, every element carefully chosen and meaningful. She can’t imagine memorializing such a bright soul in any other way, but building it is a little more difficult. She knows it shouldn’t be that hard. It’s a simple enough design, but she’s to building things with a keyboard not with a hammer and nails. She knows that she has to get this right, absolutely perfect. She owes him that much.

After a few sleepless nights of work and more than mishap with the hammer, it’s done. She hangs it in the common room where she can still feel Trip’s magnetic, happy presence. Now, that presence will remain there memorialized for Trip's friends and for future agents of SHIELD if it cannot be remembered by the broader public at the moment.

It isn’t much, but she knows it’s enough, knows it’s just right, when she watches her colleagues catch sight of it throughout the following days and smile ruefully, each taking a moment to feel gratitude for Trip’s unique brand of humor as they stare at his smiling picture and hear the echoes of the words etched there:  _I bring the noise and the funk wherever I go._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's super short, but I literally never write Skye so this was a bit of a challenge.


End file.
